Monday, April 30, 2007

Winners and Losers of the NFL Draft
Editor's Note: Phil Prusa checks in with his post-draft thoughts

WINNERS
1. Cleveland Browns
Got two holes filled (offensive tackle and quarterback) for a relatively reasonable price. They won't be drafting in the first round in the 2008 Draft, but the flip side is that they got to use two first rounds this year on players they like

2. Brady Quinn
He gets to play for the team he grew up rooting for as a kid. Dream come true for most.

3. Arizona Cardinals
Got the tackle they loved (Levi Brown) at pick five without ever having to make a trade and then have DT Alan Branch fall all the way to them in the second round. Second straight year that the draft has been kind to the birds.

4. Roger Goodell
The new NFL commissioner looked clearly excited to be heading his first draft and scored major points with the media on his handling of the Brady Quinn situation (allowing Quinn to go to a private suite after Miami passed on him). This was the fans first real chance to see Goodell up close and he made a good first impression.

5. Chicago Bears
Yes this was a weak tight end draft, but the Bears had to be shocked when Greg Olsen fell to them at pick No. 31. Fills a huge void in the Bears passing game.

LOSERS
1. Brady Quinn
Huh? A winner and a loser? Well, look at the money he's leaving on the table by dropping to #22 overall (still, it's not like he'll be taking a part time job any time soon).

2. Tom Condon
For the second-straight year, the super agent had a client of his sweat in the green room while teams passed on him. Not saying it's Condon's fault, but it sure hurts him in the eyes of possible clients.

3. Miami Dophins
Hmmm...You have the 9th overall pick in this draft. What do you do? take a franchise quarterback that you desperately need given your current depth chart or take a wide receiver now when you can get one at any time in the draft? You take the receiver of course! Never mind that the best anyone had Ted Ginn Jr going was No. 14 overall.

4. Troy Smith
We found out just how much the Championship game hurt his draft status and it was a rough drop. He went in the fifth round to Baltimore.

5. Michael Vick
He can't keep his name out of the media. This time it was for evidence of dog fighting at his home. I'm not saying the media would have ignored this story, but for it to happen on the week of the NFL when everyone has their eyes on the NFL, Vick got roasted.

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Saturday, April 28, 2007

After this day in the draft, what I want to write about is ...
The Browns third pick, UNLV cornerback Eric Wright.
It's safe to say this pick is a gamble. In the wake of Pacman Jones and the knowledge that at any moment some Bengal is either getting arrested, in court or on a crime spree, the pick of Wright has to be seen as questionable.
CBS Sportsline's Gregg Doyle said earlier this week, "Which NFL team still values talent over character? We'll see when someone drafts this guy."
Well, Browns GM Phil Savage drafted him. Not only that, he traded quite a few picks to do so. I'm all for giving second chances (sorta), but my concern over Wright comes because the NFL is hardly a place for players to improve their character.
It was said Wright would have been a first round pick if not for his off the field issues.
So what do we have here?
I don't know, but the Browns apparently felt he was worth the risk. People always talk about character on winning teams. But the Browns aren't a winning team, and Savage knows that.
I am trying to think of one guy who came into the NFL with baggage like Wright's and ended up OK.
Right now I'm drawing a blank. Maybe that's because it's late.
But I'm skeptical. With the recent problems of NFL players, you have to be.

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Thursday, April 26, 2007

Phil's Mock Draft
Editor's Note: Lots of sports blogs do mock drafts. I don't because I'd run out of knowledge and energy about three picks in.
But contributor Phil Prusa knows way more than I do, and will be filling the need for a mock draft on this site. My thanks to him.

I've conceded that there will be at least 4 trades on draft day that completely destroy my mock draft. That said, here's how I see the first round breaking down.

1. Raiders - JaMarcus Russell/QB/LSU
Once the smoke clears, I still feel that Oakland takes the strongest arm in this year's draft.

2. Lions - Calvin Johnson/WR/Georgia Tech
Maybe fourth time is the charm on a first round receiver?

3. Browns - Joe Thomas/T/Wisconsin
Romeo Crennel has to win now and does not have the time to groom a rookie quarterback.

4. Buccaneers - Brady Quinn/QB/Notre Dame
May try to trade to get Calvin Johnson (who they love). Still, If they stay pat and Johnson is gone, wouldn't hurt to solidify the QB position.

5. Cardinals - Adrian Peterson/RB/Oklahoma
Simply put, Peterson is too good to pass up here if he's available. Might look at one of the DE's as well.

6. Redskins - Jamaal Anderson/DE/Arkansas
Hard to see Washington not taking one of the defensive ends in this draft.

7. Vikings - LaRon Landry/S/LSU
Another team who might trade. On my board, this fills a big need if they stay put.

8. Falcons - Gaines Adams/DE/Clemson
Have to replace Patrick Kerney. Landry also gets a strong look if he's still available.

9. Dolphins - Levi Brown/T/Penn State
Instant starter who fills a big need for the next 10 years. What's not to like?

10. Texans - Leon Hall/CB/Michigan
Should be able to give immediate help to the secondary in Houston.

11. 49ers - Patrick Willis/LB/Mississippi
Holes are all over that defense, so they can go a lot of ways here. I see Willis as the guy who can contribute the quickest.

12. Bills - Paul Posluszny/LB/Penn State
Need a linebacker after London Fletcher's departure.

13. Rams - Amobi Okoye/DT/Louisville
Okoye becomes the first steal on my draft board with the Rams getting him at this slot. That run defense was miserable last year.

14. Panthers - Lawrence Timmons/LB/Florida State
Big big reach here, but they have to replace Dan Morgan. If Timmons is the guy, a trade down could happen.

15. Steelers - Alan Branch/DT/Michigan
Pittsburgh can't believe Branch is still available here and makes the pick in under five minutes.

16. Packers - Marshawn Lynch/RB/California
Couple of character issues aside, Lynch remains the clear second best running back in this draft after Peterson. Fits a big need in Green Bay.

17. Jaguars - Adam Carriker/DE/Nebraska
Need a pass rusher and Carriker should be able to be an week 1 starter.

18. Bengals - Darrelle Reavis/CB/Pittsburgh
Would nicely fill out the secondary in Cincinnati. Linebacker is also a possibility, though they may have to trade up to get one.

19. Titans - Ted Ginn Jr/WR/Ohio State
With Pacman Jones season long suspension, CB is certainly a possibility. Still, I think Ginn's upside and speed is too much for Tennessee to pass on.

20. Giants - Jon Beason/LB/Miami
What a difference a year makes. Last year, linebacker was considered a strength of the G-Men.

21. Broncos - David Harris/LB/Michigan
Harris stock is rising fast and Denver is in the market for a linebacker especially after losing Al Wilson.

22. Cowboys - Dwayne Bowe/WR/LSU
Dallas receivers Owens and Glenn aren't getting any younger.

23. Chiefs - Joe Staley/T/Central Michigan
They've been patching up that line ever since Willie Roaf left. Now with the retirement of Will Shields, they have to address that offensive line.

24. Patriots - Aaron Ross/CB/Texas
If Asante Samuel holds out or sits out any number of games, New England wants to be ready to replace him asap.

25. Jets - Greg Olsen/TE/Miami
By far the best tight end in a weak 2007 class. Need to give Chad Pennington some help with someone to dump the football off to.

26. Eagles - Jarvis Moss/DE/Florida
Brandon Meriweather is a possibility here, but he has character flaws. We saw last year that the Eagles will take that into account (passed on Winston Justice in last year's first round and got him in round two). Head coach loves building the lines and Moss is good fit.

27. Saints - Dwayne Jarrett/WR/USC
If he's half as good as that USC player they took in last year's NFL Draft....plus a replacement for Joe Horn is needed.

28. Patriots - Anthony Spencer/DE/Purdue
Smart football player that Bill Belicheck likes to draft. Should be an instant starter.

29. Ravens - Justin Baylock/G-T/Texas
Need to address the offensive line and need help at wide receiver. At pick 29, Baylock gets the nod.

30. Chargers - Steve Smith/WR/USC
Good: Keenan McCardell got a new foundation to promote. Bad: it was the AARP.

31. Bears - Zach Miller/TE/Arizona State
A reach to be sure, but this would instantly make Rex Grossman a better quarterback.

32. Colts - Justin Harrell/LB/Tennessee
The defending Super Bowl Champions need to replace Cato June

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Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Harry Reid's problem
If you don't like what senate majority leader Harry Reid has to say, wait a day.

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Monday, April 23, 2007

Funniest thing I've read in a while
Is right here. On the topic of ESPN, I can't help but notice how the personalities there have essentially turned into Alex Rodriguez groupies. I half expect ESPN announcers to throw their sports jackets on home plate after Rodriguez rounds the bases.
One problem. The Yankees are losing. In fact, they haven't won since A-Rod's merry jog around the bases against the Indians.
You can't judge a guy, or a team, by 18 games.
But the Yankees are 8-10. Yes, Rodriguez is directly responsible for two of those wins. But as Herman Edwards said "You play to win the game."
And the Yankees have lost for straight.
With that pitching staff, the Yankees will be lucky to finish 10 games over .500. Health and money will no doubt change the shape of the team's outlook. But in that lineup, I keep coming back to this conclusion:
A-Rod is pretty meaningless right now.

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Casey Blake Watch
Casey had a solid offensive day today, with a pair of hits. Both came with no one on, but the first ended up leading to a three run shot by Victor Martinez.
I can't comment on his defense, since I followed the game on game-cast. But it seems with Andy Marte going on the disabled list, we will see Blake at third.
Now, for the big news:
In one at-bat, Marte's replacement, outfielder Shin Soo Choo, got as many RBIs as Blake had collected in 58.
Blake might actually succeed in the two hole. He will get pitches to hit with Travis Hafner behind him. The conspiracy-theorist in me think Eric Wedge is putting him there because that's the only way he can succeed.

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Sunday, April 22, 2007

Casey Blake Watch
Two strikouts in the Indians come from behind win. But he did have a two-out double which set up Jhonny Peralta's 2-run homer Sunday. He also made some fine defensive plays -- a nice shoe-string catch while in right field, and then, after moving to third base, he made some nice picks and put outs.
If I'm going to do this, I have to be fair. Blake had a good game today.

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Crazy, crazy, crazy
If Thurday's game against the Yankees was a contest the Indians should have won (and it was), Sunday's against the Devil Rays had "loss" written all over it for 8 1/3 innings.
Cleveland was sluggish all afternoon, collecting two hits in the game before the ninth inning -- a double by the infamous Casey Blake and a homer by the next batter, Jhonny Peralta.
But it wasn't just the offense that was a problem. The bottom of the eighth inning was a disaster. Only one ball left the infield for a hit, and yet the Devil Rays scored twice. Tom Mastny's wild pitch appeared to be the game's climax.
But the Indians were given a gift by the Devil Rays, who opted not to bring in closer Al Reyes, because he had pitched in consecutive games (what are they trying to do, kill the man?). Instead, the Indians faced a shaky Brian Stokes, who hit Grady Sizemore, then with one out, walked Travis Hafner.
Victor Martinez followed with an RBI single.
Then Ryan Garko batted with runners at first and second.
To me, the at-bat was the game. Blake was on deck, and since he hasn't exactly been lighting it up with runners on this year (3 for 24), I figured Garko had to come through to avoid a series loss to Tampa Bay.
He did, clubbing a three run shot to left.
Joe Borowski had no trouble in the ninth (2 for 2 in save situations since the meltdown in the Bronx) and the Indians won.
They say things work themselves out over a baseball season. Every team, no matter how well-built, will suffer a few humiliating losses. In the last four days, the Indians had one of those.
Sunday, they got one back.
I'm still not crazy about Eric Wedge as a manager, and I'm not crazy about Blake getting so many starts.
But don't sound the alarm just yet.

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Saturday, April 21, 2007

Song quote of the day
One more night
my eyes reflect the light
in the distance something bright appears-- Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

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Baseball Karma
It doesn't make up for yesterday's loss, but the truth is, today's win counts the same as Thursday's defeat.
And while Travis Hafner saved the Indians, Mariano Rivera was choking away a five run lead in the eighth inning against the Red Sox.
Alex Rodriguez is still playing like Alex Rodriguez. He was pumping his fists and cheering, and then had to watch his team do what the Indians did yesterday.
Baseball Karma.

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Friday, April 20, 2007

Reliving the Indians game
With everything going on in the world today, in the grand scheme of things, yesterday's Indians game doesn't mean much.
I want to get that out of the way first, because we do, as sportswriters, have a tendency to overstate things.
Yesterday's Indians loss was embarrassing. But it was not tragic.
---
In the blur of what happened in the ninth inning, there wasn't much to write about last night. In order to understand the blown save, I re-watched the ninth inning today.
Some thoughts:
-Originally, I was hard on Eric Wedge for not ordering a walk to Alex Rodriguez. A day later, I don't think it would have mattered. The bottom line was Joe Borowski didn't have it. The last pitch he threw to Rodriguez could have been hit out of the park by any hitter in the majors.
It was down the middle on a 1-0 count. So many of Borowski's pitches in the ninth inning were that way.
The batter after Rodriguez was Jason Giambi, the (as Tom Hamilton said) ehhhemm, weight lifter.
Giambi has outstanding numbers against Borowski, and would have gotten a hit. Maybe he would have lined out, but the odds would be in his favor.
---
As bad as it was, I'm not going to sound the alarm on Borowski. Unlike Fausto Carmona, Borowski has been a closer before, and has succeeded in the role. He'll be fine.

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Casey Blake Watch
Thursday against the Yankees:
Five at-bats, no hits, two strikeouts, seven left on base.

In fairness, I thought his grounder hits to Alex Rodriguez in the ninth should have been ruled a hit instead of an error. If it had been ruled a hit, Blake would have had his first hit with runners in scoring position, and an RBI.

I like how Eric Wedge rests Andy Marte and Josh Barfield when they are struggling, but sticks with Blake, as if he will somehow magically change as a player at 33.
In response to Erik's comment below:
Tom Hamilton relayed this little bit from Eric Wedge during today's game:"Casey Blake is the perfect teammate. He just goes out and plays hard no matter where you put him."

Well, Eric Wedge, I'll play hard and play wherever you put me too. It doesn't mean I should be in the big leagues. Playing hard is one thing (and I will never doubt Blake's effort). Playing well is another.

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Thursday, April 19, 2007

Indians commentary
AHHHHHHHHHHH!

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Obama opens his mouth at the wrong time
In the past, I have gone easy on Senator Barack Obama.
He seems likable and genuine. But if his recent comments are any indication, the senator may be in over his head.
What the American public has gotten from Obama is style over substance. He represents a new choice; a new day. I can't speak for anyone on the right but myself, but I have to say Obama has made himself more appealing than Senator Hillary Clinton. That is, of course, because he's not Senator Clinton.
Obama's campaign appears to be more about who he's not than who he is, at least from a political perspective.
It's been that way since he rose to national attention.
I didn't see his speech at the 2004 Democratic Convention, but I remember it getting rave reviews.
Almost two years later, when the Illinois senator was contemplating a presidential run, I felt I needed to ask what he had done to warrant such consideration. My fellow workers said nothing (not in words, but in silence). The one who finally spoke up mentioned his "great speech" at the convention.
When I asked the co-worker what the speech was about, he told me he didn't know.
"But it was a great speech," the man assured me.
Charm will get you a long way, but eventually, a candidate has to be able to distinguish themself with more than that.
For all of the momentum Obama has, it could all be erased by a major mistake. Whether his comments in the wake of the Virginia Tech tragedy will be that mistake is not clear.
But if I worked on the Obama campaign and read this, I'd be more than a little concerned.

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Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Casey Blake Watch
Coming into Tuesday's game against the Yankees, Indians player Casey Blake is 0 for 11 with runners in scoring position.
Eric Wedge's solution:
Blake is batting fifth tonight.

Update
Blake has four at-bats, strikes out twice, hits into a double play and pops up in a 9-2 loss.

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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Hitchens
It has been a great disappointment to me that Christopher Hitchens' web site (which can be accessed at the left) hasn't been updated in almost six weeks.
My favorite writer is still pounding out columns, to be sure, but finding them (and then linking them here) has become a bit more difficult.
In his latest work, Hitch comes to the defense of Paul Wolfowitz. That alone ought to make many people not want to read it.
But Hitchens has stood up for the man before, and that has always given me confidence in him.

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Monday, April 16, 2007

An Interview with me
I'm pretty sure this is the only interview I have ever given, and it came two days before I graduated from BG in December of 2003.
My good friend Dan Gedney conducted this interview, and came up with the questions. I am kind of surprised this interview is still archived.
Almost four years later, I have to chuckle at some of my answers, and I think it shows why I should never be interviewed. Some of the highlights:
"I don't like cocky people generally."

"There's a difference between being witty and trying to be witty. It's not funny if everyone knows your trying to be funny."

And my personal favorite answer, when asked about my favorite athlete of all time.

Muhammad Ali. For me he just sort of personifies cool. I don't like cocky people generally, but he was cocky and he backed it up. I don't mind cocky people if they back it up. He was retired before I was born, but just his presence, I still love that."

Some thoughts, four years later:
- Me saying I don't like cocky people is like Kate Walsh saying she doesn't like redheads.
- There is, I still believe, a difference between being witty and trying to be witty. No one has shown that more over the last three and a half years than me.
-See, now if someone else had given an answer like I did on the athlete question, I'd mock them to no end. How can my favorite athlete be someone who wasn't even active when I was born? Why didn't I just say Jesse Owens?

I'm surprised Dan was able to conduct the interview with a straight face.

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Sunday, April 15, 2007

Fun day at the yard
The Indians and Reds combine for three hits -- and both win. After the Indians recorded 13 hits against the White Sox Friday and didn't win, perhaps Sunday was retribution.
As for the Reds, this has become a pattern. They start out great and fade down the stretch.
Still, I like this team more than any Reds squad since the 1999 team.
Josh Hamilton looks great, and the starting rotation has the potential to be one of the best in the National League.
The bullpen is improved. And you know that in that ballpark, with those hitters, the Reds won't struggle at the plate for long.
A Reds-Indians World Series?
Well, let's not go nuts.

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Saturday, April 14, 2007

The fourth-annual Andy Barch NFL Draft interview
NFL draft expert and the voice of the West Virginia Power, Andy Barch, talks to the blog for the fourth-consecutive year.

Zach: We start with Oakland. Is there a chance they won't take JaMarcus Russell with the first pick?

Andy: Yes, I think there is a chance they take Calvin Johnson. I don't think that's the right pick, but they will trade Randy Moss eventually, and they will take the guy that has been named the best player in this year's draft. There is too much to like about Calvin Johnson, and even though Al Davis loves guys like Russell, who has a cannon for an arm, I think he'll go with Johnson to make a big splash.

Zach: So what do you place the odds on Johnson going to Oakland?

BIGAB35: Ummm ... 4 to 1. It's either Joe Thomas, Brady Quinn, Jamarcus Russell or Johnson.

Zach: OK, it's time for the annual "Whose career will be screwed up by the Browns" question.

Andy: Nice one, Zach.

Zach: You realize it's an actual question ...

Andy: well Zach, I think the guy they are going to pick will be Brady Quinn, which would be the stupidest selection in the franchise's existance. I honestly cannot believe they are even considering him, but it sounds like he's the guy, and he'll be ABSOLUTELY AWFUL in Cleveland. He will get crushed behind that offensive line, and there is no way in the world that he lasts three years in the league. He was terrible against good college defenses, and he buckles under any kind of defensive pressure.

Zach: what about Adrian Peterson? Wasn't he the guy, according to Kiper?

Andy: If Calvin Johnson goes one, that leaves either Joe Thomas or JaMarcus Russell at the third spot for the Browns. Savage LOVES Russell, so he'd definitely pick him if he's there, but I don't think he will be, and if they pass on Joe Thomas, they are INSANE.

Zach: So where does Peterson go?

Andy: Adrian Peterson is not a good fit (in Cleveland); he has an injury riddled history, his luck, and that franchise's luck the last few years, equals DISASTER. He goes No. 8 to Houston.

Zach: Fair enough. So another few questions. I don't think there's any doubt Troy Smith hurt himself with the championship game. How much did it hurt him, and where will he go?

Andy: It sounds like he's going to fall to the third round. Apparently he's added some un-needed weight, but you have to think that a proven winner will warrant some attention. I don't buy that he's short, he's just as tall as Mike Vick. I dont buy that his arm isnt strong enough; I've seen him throw a consistant deep ball. I also think his leadership skills shouldn't be questioned. He's a winner, and he'll be a late day-one pick.

Zach: Any interested teams? Or rather, where is he a good fit?

Andy: He's not going to start anywhere right away, so its tough to project, but I'd say a team like Philly, or maybe a team like Chicago, where he can be a good time manager, and not make mistakes.

Zach: What about Teddy Ginn? He has to go top 20.

Andy: I dont know about Teddy Ginn. It sounds like he's going in the top 15, but I don't think he's worth a top 15 spot; he's too small, and he'll never be more than a slot receiver and a return man in the NFL. He's Az Zahir Hakim at best.

Zach: Am I wrong, or are people just mesmerized by his speed?

Andy: They are, but as you know, there is more to this game than speed. He wasn't very consistent after his freshmen year; he also isn't a big target, and he's not really one of those guys that you look at and say, "wow, this guy is going to be a playmaker one day." I think he'll be ok, a solid player, but not great.

Zach: So what team does he go to?

Andy: I say he goes 11th to the 49ers.

Zach: OK, of all the guys talked about in the top 10, who looks like a bust?

Andy: Brady Quinn, I honestly believe he'll never make it in the NFL. He was protected by Charlie Weiss, and he failed miserably in big games in college. When he faced pressure in the way of blitzes, he hung his receivers out to dry, threw the ball away too soon, and I just don't think he's as good as his college numbers indicated.

Zach: OK, cool. For the fourth-straight year, thanks.

Andy: Thank you sir. Always a pleasure.

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Great moments in Indians broadcasting
Indians television announcer Matt Underwood, during the Indians-White Sox game Saturday:
"Tomorrow, Josh Barfield will not be wearing No. 29, he will be wearing No. 42 to honor Jackie Robinson. Tomorrow is Jackie Robinson today, and all the major league players that will wear the No. 42 jerseys will be auctioned."

Boy, maybe it's just me, but auctioning players on Jackie Robinson Day is a tad inappropriate. And by the way, the start of the second sentence is not a misprint.

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Geraldo calls Al Sharpton a "great man"
Wow, I have lost a lot of respect for Geraldo. Oh wait.

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Friday, April 13, 2007

Le Anne Schreiber's first column
The new omsbudsman at ESPN hits a home run in her first column, asking the question a lot of us have been asking over the years:
Why is he yelling at me?
She wonders later on if she's out of touch with what the viewers want.
Ms. Schreiber, you are not out of touch with this viewer.
She nails a few of the offenders by name, which I appreciate.
I think other people will appreciate her perspective as well.

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The Reality of Major League
Most baseball fans have an appreciation for the film Major League. Certainly the movie has its appeal for all fans, just as Field of Dreams, Bull Durham or Eight Men Out do.
But I'm not sure non-Indians fans understand just why the movie was, and still is, so special to Cleveland faithful.
The movie was re-released this week on DVD, with two documentaries, an alternate ending (!) and trailers.
Even if you have the movie on DVD (I did, but I left it somehere and someone still has it), you should pick this up.
But back to the main point.
To Cleveland fans, Major League represented something most had never seen -- an Indians title.
The film was made in 1989, 35 years after the last Indians title. Not only had the Indians not won a title, but for most of those years, they hadn't even been close.
So when Wesley Snipes slid accross the plate in the playoff game to end the movie, the emotions that generated were real. Even at 11 (when my parents finally let me watch the edited version) I doubted I'd ever see an Indians title.
Of course, just making a movie about the Indians would have been one thing. But since the film is really, really, good, it made the experience of watching it an exciting deal.
I'm not sure if non-Indians have that same feeling when they watch.

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Busy Day
I almost started this post by wondering if Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, currently busy milking every bright light they can out of the ridiculous Don Imus story, will apoligize to the Duke Lacrosse players they demonized.
But singling Jackson and Sharpton out is not fair. There were many others that probed the "deeper issues" of the case before anyone knew anything.
In truth, Jackson and Sharpton look a lot better than former district attorney Mike Nifong, who pursued the case against mounting evidence and brought the students down with him.
I don't expect Sharpton or Jackson to apoligize, and I don't expect Nifong to either. Sharpton and Jackson will continue to follow the lights. Nifong has more pressing matters (like getting disbarred).
To me, the case was more about evidence. Instead of waiting, a number of people jumped on the story, and to conclusions. In the process, everything was trivialized.

On Imus
Don Imus is a shock jock, which is a synonym for pointless. What he said was wrong and inappropriate. If I heard that on the radio, I'd change the channel. If I saw his remark on TV, I'd have turned it off.
But the Don Imus story, or the importance of it, has one little problem.
It's Don Imus. Don Imus.
So why does anyone care?
He's not a senator. He's not a congressman. He's not even on Grey's Anatomy. He's an old fool who doesn't really matter. He said something stupid and offensive, which is what I think shock jocks are supposed to do. That doesn't mean it's OK. But that is the job description.
I fear what some people are doing is using this remark for their own benefit.
The funny thing is, I did have a passing respect Imus before this, because when he had politicians on, he would be fair with them, regardless of their party. (Translation: I never listened to his show, but read transcripts of some of his interviews, mainly with politicians).
And just about everyone has been on his show.
But his remark is, according to many who listen to him, nothing new.
So why is everyone acting so shocked?
And again, why does anyone care?
All suspending Imus did was make it so his small number of fans can't listen to him. The ones calling for his resignation probably never do anyway, so there lives are unaffected.
Jason Whitlock makes some interesting points in his latest column. I'm not sure I agree with all of them, but that's common.
It's worth reading.

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Sunday, April 08, 2007

Is this someone's idea of a sick joke?
I'm starting to believe someone at the Indians is taunting me.
Go to Indians.com and check out the poll question. The question is what is the Indians' best opening day moment.
The choices:
* Frank Robinson's home run as player-manager in 1975
* Indians beat M's in 11 to open Jacobs Field in 1994
*Casey Blake's grand slam vs Twins last season
* Bob Feller tosses no-hitter at Chicago in 1940
OK, where to start?
Robinson's home run, in his first game as Indians' manager, is one of the great moments in baseball history. The Jacobs Field opener helped set the tone for a new era. Bob Feller's no-hitter is a feat which has yet to be matched, despite 67 years.
Which, brings us to the other selection -- Blake's homer. I barely even remember it. The Indians won the game, but considering they lost seemingly everything else for the remainder of the season, it didn't really matter.
The other three choices are all significant, either in baseball or Indians' history.
Blake's homer was meaningless, and yet it's a choice for the best opening day moment?
When I voted (I voted for Feller), 734 people had voted for the Blake homer.
My running theory is Eric Wedge (what with all the free time he has these days) is voting for the Blake homer over and over again.

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The darndest thing just happened
Bob Wickman pitched a 1-2-3 ninth in the Braves' 3-2 win over the Mets. That's about as likely as LeBron James missing two free throws with the game on the line against the Pistons. Oh, wait.

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Snow days
I'm beginning to wonder if the Indians will ever play again. This, of course, gives the Indians a built-in excuse should they start up flat in the coming days.
And it won't be easy to bounce back to what has amounted to an all-star break.
But the Indians can't afford a slow start in this division. In past years, we have seen what starting slow has meant to the rest of the season.
I could go off on the scheduling, but honestly, I don't ever remember a first week of the season like this one. In the first week, the Indians have had a game canceled, but never a line of them like this. What I do blame baseball for is scheduling the Mariners in the first week.
Thanks to the unbalanced schedule (which I also have a problem with), the Indians and Seattle were set to meet only once in Cleveland this season. So it forces immediate doubleheaders. And when those get snowed out, you have a real problem.

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Song quote of the day
Stand back, stand back
in the middle of my room I did not hear from you
It's alright, it's alright
be standin' in a line
standin' in a line--Stevie Nicks

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Friday, April 06, 2007

Pluto on Tribe
Editor's note: This is the blog's 1,500th post ever. Celebrate how I would ... with a glass of cranberry juice and a side of sarcasm.)
Grady Sizemore will probably end up being the best Indians' outfielder of the last 30 years. Better than Kenny Lofton (not as much power), better than Albert Belle (better speed and defense) and better than Manny Ramirez (better defense and hustle).
If he played for the Yankees, he's have an ESPN show named after him (did I see Jorge Posada in an ESPN commercial yesterday? Was Scott Brosius not available?).
But as great as Sizemore is, he can't compenate for the hole in the fifth spot. I don't know why Eric Wedge has Casey Blake batting fifth, but he has single-handedly has killed about three rallies already.
Anyway, Pluto sees positives, but says the Indians can't afford to lose games like the one yesterday.
He also says Eric Wedge understands that.
Then why is Blake batting fifth?

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Thursday, April 05, 2007

Pelosi goes too far
So says the Washington Post. This is going to be a long couple of years.

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Casey Blake Watch
My brother emailed me to give me this statistic: Casey Blake left nine runners on base. Blake batted fifth in today's Indians game. The last time manager Eric Wedge kept Blake that high in the lineup (as I remember it) was 2005, when he hit poorly and kept moving down in the lineup, until he was in the eighth or ninth spot.
I expect the same thing to happen this season. But no how he plays, he will not be benched. And Ryan Garko will sit.

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Wednesday, April 04, 2007

BG chooses Orr
Seems like a good choice. I originally wanted Stan Heath, but Orr has had success in Division I, and seems like a good fit for the program.

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Monday, April 02, 2007

Wrestlemania III (Director's cut)
This is, of course, exactly the same as the previous post. But this one has Phil Prusa's running commentary. I do a lot of MST3K-inspired stuff, so here's Phil's chance to respond to me.
I look at it as a sort of commentary track on a DVD.
Here we go:
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I'll start by saying this is strictly for the four pro wrestling fans that frequent this site.

-This is still the biggest show ever. as far as I'm concerned. And with this Sunday's show in Detroit, it seems fitting to review this.

-Live from the Pontiac Silverdome

-Aretha Franklin sings America the Beautiful. From what I heard, she'll do so again Sunday. I do think it's important to note that WWF usually ran video packages over some of the song, with pictures of American historical figures (a picture of Martin Luther King on a show with Slick, the Doctor of Style, always struck me as a strange coupling).
PHIL: Somehow, I can't be the only one who was surprised Vince didn't show a shot of "The Natural" Butch Reed -- you know, cause he had white hair and all

-We start with an introduction from the late Gorilla Monsoon, joined in the booth by ET's Mary Hart, baseball legend Bob Uecker, and Jesse Ventura. I would say this seems a tad beneath Hart, but since Entertainment Tonight has become an Anna Nicole Smith circus, I don't think that's true anymore.
PHIL: Oddly enough, of all the celebrities you just listed, Anna Nicole Smith was the only one never to appear on WWF/WWE programming.

-Opening Match: Cowboy Bob Orton and Don Muraco against The Can-Am Connection (Rick Martel and Tom Zenk).

Jesse: Muraco is looking big.

Martel is one of my favorite wrestlers, and Zenk has actually tied Honkytonk Man for the most burned bridges in a career. Three WWE Hall of Famers here, with Orton, Muraco and Mr. Fuji at ringside. I should also note Bob and Mary have disappeared, without explanation. Have to wonder what Mary Hart did that day when she wasn't on camera. Did she hang out with George Steele backstage?Anyway, Zenk and Martel (looking bigger than I ever saw before or after), use a flying bodypress and trip to pin Muraco. Nice little match. I have to think the Can-Ams were being groomed for something, although it never materialized because Zenk left WWF soon after. ** 3/4
PHIL: Long standing rumor states that Zenk left the WWF for two reasons. One was a contract dispute, and the second was that he felt that Martel was betraying him (even going as far as trying to get Zenk in marry his sister to keep Zenk "in line").

- History package of Billy Jack Haynes and Hercules Hernandez. A closeline and a beating from Hercules set up this feud.-Gene Okerlund is joined by Hercules (RIP) and Bobby Heenan. Hercules' promo is given as though he is the character from Roman times. See, this is why people think wrestling is stupid.
PHIL: See, I thought stupid was Jim Ross proudly declaring that Arachnaman hailed from "Web City" back in WCW.

- I always sort of figured Hercules was Vince McMahon's rip-off attempt of Bruiser Brody, but I could be wrong.

-Hercules vs. Billy Jack HaynesHercules get most of the offense while Jesse and Gorilla banter back and forth. I don't care what people say, these two were great together. I can only assume they got along off camera. Hercules keeps hammering on Haynes, but picks him up at two, resulting in a discussion from the announcers about whether you should be picking up opponents. I think you should always take the pin, since that would end this match, which isn't exactly a show stealer. Herc puts BJH in the full nelson, and we actually get analysis about why the hold is ineffective -- Herc can't lock the fingers behind BJH's head. That's missing today.Double clothesline spot leads to Haynes hitting a few moves and setting up a full nelson. Jesse, after the 100th clothesline of the match:"I guess the clothesline is what these guys are going to use a lot."
I like him so much more in wrestling than in politics.
Haynes puts on the full nelson, but Herc falls out of the ring, leading to a double countout. * 1/2
Nothing quite like a throwaway finish on the biggest show ever. Herc attack BJH with a chain afterwards and leaves him laying.
Gorilla: He might have busted him right open, Jess.
Jesse: He did; he did. He did.So, did he?
PHIL: Just wondering...but what did Billy Jack Haynes do in the WWF besides this match? Seriously, I have thought about other par per views, other feuds, and other big time events, and his name NEVER comes up.


-Gene does interviews for the mixed-midget wrestling thing-King Kong Bundy, Little Tokyo, and Lord Littlebrook v. Hillbilly Jim, Haiti Kid (RIP) and Little Beaver (RIP) Uecker joins the guys for commentary, setting up one of the great lines in Wrestlemania history. Anyway, I am not a fan of midget wrestling. Since this is the 2005 DVD release, Don't Go Messin with a Country Boy is dubbed over with something that sounds like Country Dance on a Casio.Little Beaver goes after Bundy, which Ventura protests. This sets up Uecker's moment of glory:

Uecker: I think there's a lot of Beaver all over this place.
Ueck pauses for a second, then tries to cover for his Rated PG-13 slip. Anyway, Bundy gets disqualified for squashing a midget. *
PHIL: This match proves that, with great commentary, even a lame gimmick match like this can be fun. Uecker should be in the WWE Celebrity wing of the WWE Hall of Fame.

- Mary Hart interviews Elizabeth (RIP), but Macho interrupts and hits on Hart. How Macho could ever be booed is beyond me. He was so cool.

- Video package sets up Harley Race vs. Junkyard Dog. This would have been a main event seven years earlier. As it is, it's a glorified comedy match. I need to mention the package, when JYD steals Race's cape, and Vince is screaming "The fans ... going completely bezerk!" Of course, you see the fans pretty much doing nothing.
PHIL: Of course, when Vince was ever on commentary, every single thing he ever saw was unbelievable.
-Interviews with Gene, with Bobby again setting the tone. Uecker leaves the booth to hit on Moolah. Advice to anyone envisioning such a thing: don't.
PHIL: One reason to watch WrestleMania IV: Uecker is back and berates Gorilla and Jesse for a few seconds, saying he got new glasses and won't be fooled into chasing Moolah a second year in a row.

-JYD (RIP) v. Harley RaceDog was not much of a worker, but even a few years past his peak, he gets a monster response. The loser of this match bows to the winner. Months ago, Vivek asked me to work in a Grab Them Cakes reference somewhere on my blog. Never found use for it until now.Race is just bumping like crazy trying to get the match over. It's almost Hennig like. I mean, he's flying all over the place for Dog's offense. JYD eventually gets distracted by Bobby, and Race hits a belly-to-belly suplex for the win. ** Dog bows to Race, then decks him with a chair.

Ventura: I have never in my day seen such a cheap shot in my life Monsoon.
Gorilla: I loved it.Ventura: You loved it? If Harley Race was doing that I'd have to hold you back up here.

Dog leaves with the cape and crown. WWE has played this clip a lot over the years, never really mentioning that Dog lost the match.
PHIL: Probably the only time in the history of WWF/WWE will you hear a commentator use the word "curtsey."

- Vince McMahon (who somehow is only making his second and final appearance on the show) interviews Hulk about his match. I wonder if this was taped the day of the show. - Gene interviews the Dream Team, establishing Dino Bravo (RIP) is in their corner, along with Johnny Valient-Fabulous Rougeaus v. The Dream Team (Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine)One of my favorite matches ever, just because of the commentary. Gorilla starts the fun by noting the Dream team is bringing four guys to the ring. Gorilla: This is not a six-man match, Jess. What are all these guys doing out here?Jesse: Advisers, Gorilla.The teams are having a solid match, but Bobby the Brain elevates it to legendary status by barging into the broadcast booth. He speaks clearly, with crazy excitement. He brags about being 2-0, which draws another classic exchange: Gorilla: You're one for three in my book. You didn't win the Hernandez match; King Kong Bundy lost.Bobby: I wasn't out there for that match. I don't deal with midgets
PHIL: If you never heard Gorilla and Heenan do commentary on anything from live matches to Tuesday Night Titans, you're missing a real treat. These two played off each other better than duo I've ever experienced.
Heel miscommunication sets up the Rougeaus finishing move (a bizzare mid-section to face off the top thing), but with the ref distracted, Bravo comes off the top and puts Hammer on top. ** 3/4

Gorilla: Dino Bravo came in and turned the ta... aw, give me a break. I suppose you call that fair, Brain?
Bobby: A win's a win.

Beefcake is miffed by the finish, and the other three leave him behind, setting up his face turn. So the Dream Team breaks up, and the Rougeaus still can't win? This continues my running theory that the Fabs never won a match. Ever.
PHIL: Do house show wins count?

-Video package sets up the classic Hair v. Hair match between Roddy Piper and Adrian Adonis (RIP). I recently picked up the AWA DVD, and couldn't believe how great the East-West Connection was. Adonis was a heck of a worker, and decent in the promos they showed. I know he gained weight after arriving in the WWF, but why did he get saddled with the "Adorable" gimmick? The package also shows Piper at his best. Adrian Adonis v. Roddy PiperPiper was about as popular as Hogan was at the time. This was his retirement, although he came back so many times afterwards, that part of the story has lost its impact. Adonis is a sad story, since he died a little more than a year later in a car accident. He was only 33. The place, as mentioned, is going nuts for Hot Rod. I should also point out this was a hair vs. hair match, as is this year's contest between Lashley and Umaga. Piper and Adonis trade belt shots. The match isn't great, but the place is going crazy. I think in some ways, Vince is trying to recreate this match with the Donald Trump angle. Manager Jimmy Hart gets tossed off the top rope. Man, everybody was going all out. The other thing is by this point, Adonis had put on a ton of weight. Piper uses his charisma to keep the crowd going. Adonis puts on the sleeper, but releases it too soon. While he celebrates, Beefcake runs in (apparently he had his hair cut by Adonis weeks prior, but I've never seen the tape and the announcers barely mention it) and wakes up Piper. Piper is revived, and puts Adonis in a sleeper to end the match. Beefcake cuts Adonis' hair (which eventually sets up his "barber" gimmick) They never get around to cutting all of Adonis' hair, but it's close enough.Piper is announced as the winner, and kisses ring announcer Howard Finkel on the head. As he's celebrating, he's joined by a fan. Piper keeps his cool and shakes the kid's hand, then pushes him back as the camera cuts away. If you watch the ring, you see the fan get mad-rushed by security. Wonder whatever happened to the fan.
PHIL: Adonis actually did get his head shaved. It happened backstage and then the WWF ran a storyline with him being all depressed that he was no longer "Adorable." He died shortly after this. Real shame that this is how most people will remember his career. As far as the fan who stupidly rushed the ring, all I can remember is he got tackled by about half the WWF security force.

-Piper gets congratulated by Pat Patterson, Jack Lanza, and what looks to be Arnold Skaaland (RIP). Skaaland just died last week.

-Bob and Mary are back to do commentary. Mary's kind of annoying, but Bob is great. It seems, from his commentary, that he was a true fan. Mary sounds like Gordon Solie compared to the celebrity announcers they had at Wrestlemania II. If you've never heard the trifecta of Susan St. James, Kathy Lee Crosby and Elvira, consider yourself lucky.
PHIL: Somewhere Zach, Susan St. James is saying "UH-OH!!"

-Hart Foundation (Jim Neidhart and Bret Hart) and Danny Davis v. British Bulldogs (Davey Boy Smith (RIP) and Tom "Dynamite Kid" Billington) and Tito SantanaIf you want to hear true heel heat, wait until Davis tags in. Davis is, of course, the heel referee who cost the Bulldogs and Santana their titles. Mary clears up she's not related to Jimmy Hart. Well, she's trying. I love this match. Every time the Harts are in command, the Harts tag in Davis, who walks in, kicks the faces in the back, grins, and tags out. Some promoters may have made him world champion with that kind of heat. Dynamite had broken his back and couldn't do much. Just about a year earlier, he was considered one of the greatest wrestlers ever. I read his book, and he was very honest about himself and everyone else. It's sad to watch the Bulldogs, knowing that Davey has passed and Dynamite is in a wheelchair. The heels pretty much control the match, until Davis tries a body press and Davey gets his knees up. Santana tags in and he's TICKED. Santana just destroys Davis, and doesn't take the pin, instead putting on the figure four. It's broken up, and Davey tags in. What follows is pretty fun to watch. Davey hits him with a piledriver, suplex and powerslam, with the crowd going crazy. Anvil makes the save, and in the free-for-all, Jimmy Hart tosses in the megaphone and Davis gets the pin. *** Wow, that took some guts.
Bob: You'll never hear the end of it.
The segment ends with Mary interrupting Gorilla, and Gorilla ignoring her.
PHIL: If you watch this with no prior knowledge of who anyone is, You'd swear Uecker is a member of WWF. He is just so fluid with his commentary. You also know the Hart Foundation was going to win this match since having Tito on your team at WrestleMania is like walking under a bridge, breaking a mirror, and crossing paths with a black cat all on the same day.

-Mean Gene interviews Bobby and Andre. Well, actually, Andre just stands there and looks like a badass, while Bobby cuts one of the best promos I have ever heard. He lays out all the cards: Andre's bigger, tougher, undefeated, unbeatable. Hogan has no shot; Hulkamainia is dead. Everyone is picking Andre. Don't bother, Hogan. You can watch this match, but it'll be a slaughter. I'll manage the champion; I'll be famous. You know, I have seen Hogan and Andre, the match, 100 times, and it is not very good. If they show the match on complilations, they need to include this promo. Even though I know the match is bad, I still want to see it every time I watch this promo.

-And from this parade of greatness, we go to ...

-Butch Reed v. Koko B. WareThis match is notable only because they overdub Piledriver over Koko's music. Hard to listen to, actually. Koko goes with the white tights tonight, which spares WWE from having to blur out the "WWF" on his tights. You know, WCW is dead, AWA is dead, and ECW might as well be. But there's only one company name, one set of letters, that can't be said. Try saying "WWF" at a WWE show, and they'll beep you. The company can't even admit it was WWF at one point. In that sense, those other companies live on, while the WWF is non-existent. In that sense, the promoters and companies Vince ran out of business had the last laugh. Anyway, the match. Reed pins Ware with a handful of tights. *
PHIL: One star? That seems WAY too generous here.

-And now, the match that made the show into a classic. Hogan and Andre sold it, and provided the best moment. But the reason every wrestling fan needs to own this show is ... -

-Intercontinental Title MatchMacho Man Randy Savage (with Elizabeth) vs. Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat (with George Steele)
I have to get this out of the way first: Steele is not the father of current OSU star linebacker James Laurinaitis. That is Road Warrior Animal's (Joe Laurinaitis) son. OK, to the match. Savage crushed Steamboat's throat with a bell, Steele has the hots for Elizabeth (and really, who didn't?) and Steamboat is the usual sympathetic babyface. Savage is a heel, but you can tell the crowd is starting to get into him. Also, WWE's cheapness shows again, as they dub over Steamboat's Alan Parson's Project music.
We start fast with Savage taking control. Ventura and Monsoon both put Savage over huge.
Steamboat takes over with an arm drag, and shots to the back. Savage goes back on offense. Everything these guys are doing has a crispness to it. Steamboat knocks Savage into the ropes, and bow we're moving. Steamboat uses a body press to set up pin attempts, but Savage catches Steamboat and sends him backwards into the ropes (how often do you see that?), then hits him with a knee to the back. In one of my favorite parts of the match, Randy throws Steamboat out, but the Dragon skins the cat to get back in. Savage responds by casually clotheslining him over the top again. Steele tries to help Steamboat, but Savage attacks and sends Dragon into the crowd. Steele helps him back in to break the count, but Savagethrows him out again, then connects with an axe handle off the top. Jesse yells about the officiating. Savage gets another axe handle, then a running elbow. Then Macho does his patented "closeline the guy against the top rope while I fly over it" move. To make it even better, he goes back in the ring and covers. Gorilla says it could be a disqualification. In what universe? Dragon finally starts to make a comeback, and the crowd is eating out of his hand. Macho charges Dragon, but Dragon throws him over. Now Jesse wants a DQ. Maybe in WCW 1995.Here's one thing that was neat about the time period. Steamboat hits a chop off the top and covers. The crowd doesn't see Savage kick out, so it goes crazy. But Savage has his foot on the rope. Nowadays, fans are trained to only expect a finish after a finishing move or a shot from a foreign object. Occasionally we get a rollup finish, but you can usually see those coming a mile away. Back in 1987, the fans believed the match could end at any time, so they paid attention to the whole thing, rather than just waiting for a finishing move. Steamboat goes for a number of pinning combinations, but Macho keeps kicking out.

Jesse: This is one of the greatest matches I've ever seen Gorilla.

That's a shoot, brother. Savage reverses one of Steamboat's combinations into one of his own grabbing the tights, but Dragon kicks out. This sets up the finish, as a series of reversals end with ref Dave Hebner knocked out. Savage goes to the top, and with the flashbulbs popping, nails the elbow off the top. Still one of my favorite moves ever. He covers, but Hebner is still out. So Macho goes outside for the bell, but The Animal intercepts it. Savage gets it back, but as he goes to the top, Steele pushes him off, into the ring. Gorilla speculates the bell might have hit Savage. Either way, the champ is woozy. He stumbles to his feet and picks Steamboat up (grabbing his lower back in pain first). But Steamboat reverses the slam into a cradle, and gets the pin. The crowd goes crazy. The storyline here was that Steamboat was beaten, and could have been beaten several times. But Savage took one too many chances, and it cost him the title. Steamboat gets the title, but Savage loses nothing, because everyone recognizes how great he is. Every wrestling fan needs to own this match. *****
PHIL: One final note. Long standing rumor that most people believe says that Hogan was furious with this match because he felt it took the spotlight away from him.

-Now, in the worst possible position on the card to be in, we get an interview with Jake Roberts and Alice Cooper. Cooper says this will be Jimmy Hart's nightmare. Nothing compared to when Honky and Jake came to the arena and saw their placement on the card. The interview sets up the storyline, where Honky hit Jake in the head with a guitar. According to the Jake DVD, that guitar was not gimmicked. Jake Roberts (with Alice Cooper) vs. Honky Tonk Man (with Jimmy Hart)

Gorilla: All of the sudden, out of nowhere, Jimmy Hart is now a Colonel.

Both these guys can work, and the match is solid. Jake attacks early and whips HTM into the corner, but falls prey to the allure of the blind charge. Since it's never worked in 200 years of wrestling, and doesn't work here, you'd think wrestlers would take note that you can't just run wildly into the corner. I can't help but wonder what Alice was paid for this gig. He doesn't really do anything, but rather is just standing there. But he's Alice Cooper, so it's cool.Oh right, the match. HTM goes for the shake rattle and roll, but Jake powers out of it. Back and forth, and Jake calls for the DDT. But for some reason, he backs into the corner, and Hart grabs his leg. Jake turns around, and HTM rolls him up, grabs the top rope, and gets the win ** 1/2

PHIL: This would be the first real match Jake Roberts had after his neck was legit hurt on a guitar hit to the head (in those days, they were not the break-a-way ones that you see now). Sadly, to combat the pain, Roberts road to drugs and substance abuse began.

Jesse: This is going to have to go down as a major upset.

Gorilla: Major upset? They STOLE it. They literally stole it.

-They tease Alice going after Hart, but it doesn't lead to anything.

-Gene comes into the ring to announce that there are 93,000 fans in the dome, which is a new indoor record. In other news, I am voting for Dennis Kucinich and Casey Blake is an MVP candidate.

- Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Shiek v. Killer Bs (B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell) Hacksaw interrupts Volkoff's Russian National Anthem, because "America is the land of the free." Not exactly logical, but Hacksaw's character was never the sharpest knife in the drawer. Match goes along fine until Hacksaw decided he's had enough and decks Shiek in the back with his board, drawing a DQ. These days, the B's would have turned on Hacksaw and left him laying for costing them the match. In 1987, they essentially say "well, we were gonna lose anyway, so ..." **
PHIL: What about the Killer B's? Have they ever won a match?

-Main event: WWF TitleAndre the Giant vs. Hulk HoganThe match that brought the crowd. There appears to be genuine suspense, as the crowd is excited. Bob Uecker and Mary Hart come out. Bob does the ring intros, while Mary handles the timekeeping.

-Hulk and Andre (RIP) cut promos. One of these days, I will transcribe Hogan's Wrestlemania IV promo, where he says he will slam Andre and cause a fault in the land, and all of the people in Atlantic City will fall into the ocean. But Donald Trump will be smart enough to let go of his material possessions and carry his family to safety. It's so twisted, words can't describe it. -Andre doesn't NEED theme music. He comes in on a cart to huge heel heat. People are throwing stuff at him as he comes down. Andre is getting hit with all kinds of stuff.Gorilla: Andre has literally been brainwashed. Gorilla's misuse of the term "literally" was a WWF PPV staple.-Hogan gets a huge ovation, obviously.
Joey Marella (RIP), Gorilla's son, is the ref. Hogan goes for a slam right away, but Giant falls on him and gets a close two. Andre of course, dominates with his offense. He had to be in so much pain, and yet I don't think many in the Silverdome even realized it. Hogan makes a comeback, eventually getting Andre outside, where he tries a piledriver on the concrete. I figure Hulk was stalling there. I've seen a number of Hogan matches, and have never seen him complete a piledriver, so everyone had to know he wouldn't, and couldn't get it. Eventually they get back in the ring, and Hogan "Hulks up" and slams the big man, in what may still be the biggest single moment in American pro wrestling. Hogan had slammed Andre before, back in the early 80s at Shea Stadium, when Andre was a face (with a huge afro) and Hogan was a heel managed by Fred Blassie.
But that didn't take away from this, because few people saw it, and the WWF didn't even acknowledge the two had wrestled before. *

PHIL: Simply put - one of the greatest moments in this company's history. The match itself is borderline boring at times, but you can just tell looking at Andre's face that he is in almost crippling pain.-In one of the great moments, while Hogan poses, Andre leaves in the cart with Bobby. The Brain puts his head in his hands and looks like this is the most shocking, lowest moment of his career. That's why he's the best. -Gorilla and Jess wrap things up. Surprisingly, they go back to arguing about Savage-Steamboat.-Well, there it is. The biggest show ever.
PHIL: My highlights:
1. Hogan slamming Andre
2. Savage vs Steamboat
3. Bob Uecker
4. Bobby's promo and interaction with Gorilla
5. The crowd going crazy for Piper

My lowlights:
1. Koko vs Butch Reed
2. Seeing Adrian Adnois remembered for this
3. Mary Hart

That's it for the real bad. Overall, this is a solid show to watch with some memorial matches/moments.

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Sunday, April 01, 2007

Wrestlemania III
I'll start by saying this is strictly for the four pro wrestling fans that frequent this site.

-This is still the biggest show ever. as far as I'm concerned. And with this Sunday's show in Detroit, it seems fitting to review this.

-Live from the Pontiac Silverdome

-Aretha Franklin sings America the Beautiful. From what I heard, she'll do so again Sunday. I do think it's important to note that WWF usually ran video packages over some of the song, with pictures of American historical figures (a picture of Martin Luther King on a show with Slick, the Doctor of Style, always struck me as a strange coupling).

-We start with an introduction from the late Gorilla Monsoon, joined in the booth by ET's Mary Hart, baseball legend Bob Uecker, and Jesse Ventura. I would say this seems a tad beneath Hart, but since Entertainment Tonight has become an Anna Nicole Smith circus, I don't think that's true anymore.

-Opening Match: Cowboy Bob Orton and Don Muraco against The Can-Am Connection (Rick Martel and Tom Zenk).
Jesse: Muraco is looking big.
Martel is one of my favorite wrestlers, and Zenk has actually tied Honkytonk Man for the most burned bridges in a career. Three WWE Hall of Famers here, with Orton, Muraco and Mr. Fuji at ringside.
I should also note Bob and Mary have disappeared, without explanation. Have to wonder what Mary Hart did that day when she wasn't on camera. Did she hang out with George Steele backstage?
Anyway, Zenk and Martel (looking bigger than I ever saw before or after), use a flying bodypress and trip to pin Muraco. Nice little match. I have to think the Can-Ams were being groomed for something, although it never materialized because Zenk left WWF soon after. ** 3/4

- History package of Billy Jack Haynes and Hercules Hernandez. A closeline and a beating from Hercules set up this feud.

-Gene Okerlund is joined by Hercules (RIP) and Bobby Heenan. Hercules' promo is given as though he is the character from Roman times. See, this is why people think wrestling is stupid.

- I always sort of figured Hercules was Vince McMahon's rip-off attempt of Bruiser Brody, but I could be wrong.

-Hercules vs. Billy Jack Haynes
Hercules get most of the offense while Jesse and Gorilla banter back and forth. I don't care what people say, these two were great together. I can only assume they got along off camera. Hercules keeps hammering on Haynes, but picks him up at two, resulting in a discussion from the announcers about whether you should be picking up opponents. I think you should always take the pin, since that would end this match, which isn't exactly a show stealer.
Herc puts BJH in the full nelson, and we actually get analysis about why the hold is ineffective --Herc can't lock the fingers behind BJH's head. That's missing today.
Double clothesline spot leads to Haynes hitting a few moves and setting up a full nelson.
Jesse, after the 100th clothesline of the match:

"I guess the clothesline is what these guys are going to use a lot."

I like him so much more in wrestling than in politics.
Haynes puts on the full nelson, but Herc falls out of the ring, leading to a double countout. * 1/2
Nothing quite like a throwaway finish on the biggest show ever. Herc attack BJH with a chain afterwards and leaves him laying.
Gorilla: He might have busted him right open, Jess.
Jesse: He did; he did. He did.
So, did he?

-Gene does interviews for the mixed-midget wrestling thing

-King Kong Bundy, Little Tokyo, and Lord Littlebrook v. Hillbilly Jim, Haiti Kid (RIP) and Little Beaver (RIP)
Uecker joins the guys for commentary, setting up one of the great lines in Wrestlemania history. Anyway, I am not a fan of midget wrestling. Since this is the 2005 DVD release, Don't Go Messin with a Country Boy is dubbed over with something that sounds like Country Dance on a Casio.
Little Beaver goes after Bundy, which Ventura protests. This sets up Uecker's moment of glory:
Uecker: I think there's a lot of Beaver all over this place.
Ueck pauses for a second, then tries to cover for his Rated PG-13 slip. Anyway, Bundy gets disqualified for squashing a midget. *

- Mary Hart interviews Elizabeth (RIP), but Macho interrupts and hits on Hart. How Macho could ever be booed is beyond me. He was so cool.

- Video package sets up Harley Race vs. Junkyard Dog. This would have been a main event seven years earlier. As it is, it's a glorified comedy match. I need to mention the package, when JYD steals Race's cape, and Vince is screaming "The fans ... going completely bezerk!" Of course, you see the fans pretty much doing nothing.

-Interviews with Gene, with Bobby again setting the tone. Uecker leaves the booth to hit on Moolah. Advice to anyone envisioning such a thing: don't.

-JYD (RIP) v. Harley Race
Dog was not much of a worker, but even a few years past his peak, he gets a monster response. The loser of this match bows to the winner. Months ago, Vivek asked me to work in a Grab Them Cakes reference somewhere on my blog. Never found use for it until now.
Race is just bumping like crazy trying to get the match over. It's almost Hennig like. I mean, he's flying all over the place for Dog's offense. JYD eventually gets distracted by Bobby, and Race hits a belly-to-belly suplex for the win. **
Dog bows to Race, then decks him with a chair.
Ventura: I have never in my day seen such a cheap shot in my life Monsoon.
Gorilla: I loved it.
Ventura: You loved it? If Harley Race was doing that I'd have to hold you back up here.
Dog leaves with the cape and crown. WWE has played this clip a lot over the years, never really mentioning that Dog lost the match.

- Vince McMahon (who somehow is only making his second and final appearance on the show) interviews Hulk about his match. I wonder if this was taped the day of the show.

- Gene interviews the Dream Team, establishing Dino Bravo (RIP) is in their corner, along with Johnny Valient

-Fabulous Rougeaus v. The Dream Team (Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine)
One of my favorite matches ever, just because of the commentary. Gorilla starts the fun by noting the Dream team is bringing four guys to the ring.

Gorilla: This is not a six-man match, Jess. What are all these guys doing out here?
Jesse: Advisers, Gorilla.

The teams are having a solid match, but Bobby the Brain elevates it to legendary status by barging into the broadcast booth. He speaks clearly, with crazy excitement. He brags about being 2-0, which draws another classic exchange:

Gorilla: You're one for three in my book. You didn't win the Hernandez match; King Kong Bundy lost.
Bobby: I wasn't out there for that match. I don't deal with midgets.

Heel miscommunication sets up the Rougeaus finishing move (a bizzare mid-section to face off the top thing), but with the ref distracted, Bravo comes off the top and puts Hammer on top. ** 3/4

Gorilla: Dino Bravo came in and turned the ta... aw, give me a break. I suppose you call that fair, Brain?
Bobby: A win's a win.
Beefcake is miffed by the finish, and the other three leave him behind, setting up his face turn. So the Dream Team breaks up, and the Rougeaus still can't win? This continues my running theory that the Fabs never won a match. Ever.

-Video package sets up the classic Hair v. Hair match between Roddy Piper and Adrian Adonis (RIP). I recently picked up the AWA DVD, and couldn't believe how great the East-West Connection was. Adonis was a heck of a worker, and decent in the promos they showed. I know he gained weight after arriving in the WWF, but why did he get saddled with the "Adorable" gimmick? The package also shows Piper at his best.

Adrian Adonis v. Roddy Piper
Piper was about as popular as Hogan was at the time. This was his retirement, although he came back so many times afterwards, that part of the story has lost its impact. Adonis is a sad story, since he died a little more than a year later in a car accident. He was only 33.
The place, as mentioned, is going nuts for Hot Rod. I should also point out this was a hair vs. hair match, as is this year's contest between Lashley and Umaga. Piper and Adonis trade belt shots. The match isn't great, but the place is going crazy. I think in some ways, Vince is trying to recreate this match with the Donald Trump angle. Manager Jimmy Hart gets tossed off the top rope. Man, everybody was going all out.
The other thing is by this point, Adonis had put on a ton of weight. Piper uses his charisma to keep the crowd going. Adonis puts on the sleeper, but releases it too soon. While he celebrates, Beefcake runs in (apparently he had his hair cut by Adonis weeks prior, but I've never seen the tape and the announcers barely mention it) and wakes up Piper. Piper is revived, and puts Adonis in a sleeper to end the match.
Beefcake cuts Adonis' hair (which eventually sets up his "barber" gimmick) They never get around to cutting all of Adonis' hair, but it's close enough.
Piper is announced as the winner, and kisses ring announcer Howard Finkel on the head. As he's celebrating, he's joined by a fan. Piper keeps his cool and shakes the kid's hand, then pushes him back as the camera cuts away. If you watch the ring, you see the fan get mad-rushed by security. Wonder whatever happened to the fan.

-Piper gets congratulated by Pat Patterson, Jack Lanza, and what looks to be Arnold Skaaland (RIP). Skaaland just died last week.

-Bob and Mary are back to do commentary. Mary's kind of annoying, but Bob is great. It seems, from his commentary, that he was a true fan. Mary sounds like Gordon Solie compared to the celebrity announcers they had at Wrestlemania II. If you've never heard the trifecta of Susan St. James, Kathy Lee Crosby and Elvira, consider yourself lucky.

-Hart Foundation (Jim Neidhart and Bret Hart) and Danny Davis v. British Bulldogs (Davey Boy Smith (RIP) and Tom "Dynamite Kid" Billington) and Tito Santana
If you want to hear true heel heat, wait until Davis tags in. Davis is, of course, the heel referee who cost the Bulldogs and Santana their titles. Mary clears up she's not related to Jimmy Hart. Well, she's trying.
I love this match. Every time the Harts are in command, the Harts tag in Davis, who walks in, kicks the faces in the back, grins, and tags out. Some promoters may have made him world champion with that kind of heat. Dynamite had broken his back and couldn't do much. Just about a year earlier, he was considered one of the greatest wrestlers ever. I read his book, and he was very honest about himself and everyone else. It's sad to watch the Bulldogs, knowing that Davey has passed and Dynamite is in a wheelchair.
The heels pretty much control the match, until Davis tries a body press and Davey gets his knees up. Santana tags in and he's TICKED. Santana just destroys Davis, and doesn't take the pin, instead putting on the figure four. It's broken up, and Davey tags in.
What follows is pretty fun to watch. Davey hits him with a piledriver, suplex and powerslam, with the crowd going crazy. Anvil makes the save, and in the free-for-all, Jimmy Hart tosses in the megaphone and Davis gets the pin. ***
Wow, that took some guts.
Bob: You'll never hear the end of it.
The segment ends with Mary interrupting Gorilla, and Gorilla ignoring her.

-Mean Gene interviews Bobby and Andre. Well, actually, Andre just stands there and looks like a badass, while Bobby cuts one of the best promos I have ever heard. He lays out all the cards: Andre's bigger, tougher, undefeated, unbeatable. Hogan has no shot; Hulkamainia is dead. Everyone is picking Andre. Don't bother, Hogan. You can watch this match, but it'll be a slaughter. I'll manage the champion; I'll be famous.
You know, I have seen Hogan and Andre, the match, 100 times, and it is not very good. If they show the match on complilations, they need to include this promo. Even though I know the match is bad, I still want to see it every time I watch this promo.

-And from this parade of greatness, we go to ...

-Butch Reed v. Koko B. Ware
This match is notable only because they overdub Piledriver over Koko's music. Hard to listen to, actually. Koko goes with the white tights tonight, which spares WWE from having to blur out the "WWF" on his tights. You know, WCW is dead, AWA is dead, and ECW might as well be. But there's only one company name, one set of letters, that can't be said. Try saying "WWF" at a WWE show, and they'll beep you. The company can't even admit it was WWF at one point. In that sense, those other companies live on, while the WWF is non-existent. In that sense, the promoters and companies Vince ran out of business had the last laugh.
Anyway, the match. Reed pins Ware with a handful of tights. *

-And now, the match that made the show into a classic. Hogan and Andre sold it, and provided the best moment. But the reason every wrestling fan needs to own this show is ...

- Intercontinental Title Match
Macho Man Randy Savage (with Elizabeth) vs. Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat (with George Steele)
I have to get this out of the way first: Steele is not the father of current OSU star linebacker James Laurinaitis. That is Road Warrior Animal's (Joe Laurinaitis) son.
OK, to the match. Savage crushed Steamboat's throat with a bell, Steele has the hots for Elizabeth (and really, who didn't?) and Steamboat is the usual sympathetic babyface. Savage is a heel, but you can tell the crowd is starting to get into him.
Also, WWE's cheapness shows again, as they dub over Steamboat's Alan Parson's Project music.
We start fast with Savage taking control. Ventura and Monsoon both put Savage over huge.
Steamboat takes over with an arm drag, and shots to the back. Savage goes back on offense. Everything these guys are doing has a crispness to it. Steamboat knocks Savage into the ropes, and bow we're moving. Steamboat uses a body press to set up pin attempts, but Savage catches Steamboat and sends him backwards into the ropes (how often do you see that?), then hits him with a knee to the back.
In one of my favorite parts of the match, Randy throws Steamboat out, but the Dragon skins the cat to get back in. Savage responds by casually clotheslining him over the top again. Steele tries to help Steamboat, but Savage attacks and sends Dragon into the crowd. Steele helps him back in to break the count, but Savagethrows him out again, then connects with an axe handle off the top. Jesse yells about the officiating.
Savage gets another axe handle, then a running elbow. Then Macho does his patented "closeline the guy against the top rope while I fly over it" move. To make it even better, he goes back in the ring and covers. Gorilla says it could be a disqualification. In what universe?
Dragon finally starts to make a comeback, and the crowd is eating out of his hand. Macho charges Dragon, but Dragon throws him over. Now Jesse wants a DQ. Maybe in WCW 1995.
Here's one thing that was neat about the time period. Steamboat hits a chop off the top and covers. The crowd doesn't see Savage kick out, so it goes crazy. But Savage has his foot on the rope.
Nowadays, fans are trained to only expect a finish after a finishing move or a shot from a foreign object. Occasionally we get a rollup finish, but you can usually see those coming a mile away. Back in 1987, the fans believed the match could end at any time, so they paid attention to the whole thing, rather than just waiting for a finishing move.
Steamboat goes for a number of pinning combinations, but Macho keeps kicking out.

Jesse: This is one of the greatest matches I've ever seen Gorilla.

That's a shoot, brother. Savage reverses one of Steamboat's combinations into one of his own grabbing the tights, but Dragon kicks out. This sets up the finish, as a series of reversals end with ref Dave Hebner knocked out.
Savage goes to the top, and with the flashbulbs popping, nails the elbow off the top. Still one of my favorite moves ever. He covers, but Hebner is still out. So Macho goes outside for the bell, but The Animal intercepts it. Savage gets it back, but as he goes to the top, Steele pushes him off, into the ring.
Gorilla speculates the bell might have hit Savage. Either way, the champ is woozy. He stumbles to his feet and picks Steamboat up (grabbing his lower back in pain first). But Steamboat reverses the slam into a cradle, and gets the pin. The crowd goes crazy. The storyline here was that Steamboat was beaten, and could have been beaten several times. But Savage took one too many chances, and it cost him the title. Steamboat gets the title, but Savage loses nothing, because everyone recognizes how great he is.
Every wrestling fan needs to own this match. *****

-Now, in the worst possible position on the card to be in, we get an interview with Jake Roberts and Alice Cooper. Cooper says this will be Jimmy Hart's nightmare. Nothing compared to when Honky and Jake came to the arena and saw their placement on the card. The interview sets up the storyline, where Honky hit Jake in the head with a guitar. According to the Jake DVD, that guitar was not gimmicked.

Jake Roberts (with Alice Cooper) vs. Honky Tonk Man (with Jimmy Hart)
Gorilla: All of the sudden, out of nowhere, Jimmy Hart is now a Colonel.
Both these guys can work, and the match is solid. Jake attacks early and whips HTM into the corner, but falls prey to the allure of the blind charge. Since it's never worked in 200 years of wrestling, and doesn't work here, you'd think wrestlers would take note that you can't just run wildly into the corner.
I can't help but wonder what Alice was paid for this gig. He doesn't really do anything, but rather is just standing there. But he's Alice Cooper, so it's cool.
Oh right, the match. HTM goes for the shake rattle and roll, but Jake powers out of it. Back and forth, and Jake calls for the DDT. But for some reason, he backs into the corner, and Hart grabs his leg. Jake turns around, and HTM rolls him up, grabs the top rope, and gets the win ** 1/2

Jesse: This is going to have to go down as a major upset.
Gorilla: Major upset? They STOLE it. They literally stole it.

They tease Alice going after Hart, but it doesn't lead to anything.

-Gene comes into the ring to announce that there are 93,000 fans in the dome, which is a new indoor record. In other news, I am voting for Dennis Kucinich and Casey Blake is an MVP candidate.

- Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Shiek v. Killer Bs (B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell)
Hacksaw interrupts Volkoff's Russian National Anthem, because "America is the land of the free." Not exactly logical, but Hacksaw's character was never the sharpest knife in the drawer. Match goes along fine until Hacksaw decided he's had enough and decks Shiek in the back with his board, drawing a DQ. These days, the B's would have turned on Hacksaw and left him laying for costing them the match. In 1987, they essentially say "well, we were gonna lose anyway, so ..." **

-Main event
WWF Title
Andre the Giant vs. Hulk Hogan
The match that brought the crowd. There appears to be genuine suspense, as the crowd is excited. Bob Uecker and Mary Hart come out. Bob does the ring intros, while Mary handles the timekeeping.

-Hulk and Andre (RIP) cut promos. One of these days, I will transcribe Hogan's Wrestlemania IV promo, where he says he will slam Andre and cause a fault in the land, and all of the people in Atlantic City will fall into the ocean. But Donald Trump will be smart enough to let go of his material possessions and carry his family to safety. It's so twisted, words can't describe it.

-Andre doesn't NEED theme music. He comes in on a cart to huge heel heat. People are throwing stuff at him as he comes down. Andre is getting hit with all kinds of stuff.

Gorilla: Andre has literally been brainwashed.

Gorilla's misuse of the term "literally" was a WWF PPV staple.

-Hogan gets a huge ovation, obviously. Joey Marella (RIP), Gorilla's son, is the ref. Hogan goes for a slam right away, but Giant falls on him and gets a close two.
Andre of course, dominates with his offense. He had to be in so much pain, and yet I don't think many in the Silverdome even realized it. Hogan makes a comeback, eventually getting Andre outside, where he tries a piledriver on the concrete. I figure Hulk was stalling there. I've seen a number of Hogan matches, and have never seen him complete a piledriver, so everyone had to know he wouldn't, and couldn't get it.
Eventually they get back in the ring, and Hogan "Hulks up" and slams the big man, in what may still be the biggest single moment in American pro wrestling. Hogan had slammed Andre before, back in the early 80s at Shea Stadium, when Andre was a face (with a huge afro) and Hogan was a heel managed by Fred Blassie.
But that didn't take away from this, because few people saw it, and the WWF didn't even acknowledge the two had wrestled before. *

-In one of the great moments, while Hogan poses, Andre leaves in the cart with Bobby. The Brain puts his head in his hands and looks like this is the most shocking, lowest moment of his career. That's why he's the best.

-Gorilla and Jess wrap things up. Surprisingly, they go back to arguing about Savage-Steamboat.

-Well, there it is. The biggest show ever.

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