Andy Barch Draft Interview
Warning: This interview is uncut and uncensored, and therefore is, well, very raunchy. It is not suitable for readers under 18, or adults over 50 (Mom, Dad and Aunt Marilyn, that means YOU).
1. Andy, thanks for doing this again. My first question is an obvious question with perhaps not the most obvious answer. Who do you feel is the number one pick?
Hey Zach, thank you partner, my pleasure. This draft is referred to as a "need draft". There really is no clear cut "best player" or one can't miss prospect. Therefore this year's number one pick is a "need pick" for San Francisco. The only way that they wont pick here, is if Minnesota trades up to get Braylon Edwards which is still a possibility. San Francisco has more holes than a slice of Swiss cheese, so picking a WR here wouldn’t make much sense. A quarterback is always a possibility because they are ALWAYS over hyped in the draft. Lots of people like the long term potential of QB Alex Smith over Aaron Rogers, but teams aren’t interested in long term potential, they are interested in WIN NOW quarterbacks. Rodgers would be a popular choice because he is somewhat homegrown, and he has worked in a system that has helped him out a ton. If I were drafting, I'd go with someone who would make a bigger impact that one of those two quarterbacks who won't make a splash for a couple of years. I think they will go with Alex Smith because he's bigger, more mobile and has better long term potential.
2. Do you see any trade possiblities in the top five?
Again the only trade possiblity I see is Minnesota trying to move up to get Braylon Edwards. This is the kind of draft that won't allow many people to move around because the prospects at 11-20 aren’t that much better than the prospects at 5-10. This will have a domino effect, leaving the possibility of only the Edwards trade to make an impact.
3. Is there any chance Nick Saban will take a QB at number 2?
Not at all, Saban has more pressing needs than a quarterback. It hasn’t mattered since Dan Marino left who's been under center. They need some help along the line, but they also have an aging defense that needs help as well. That defense is getting old very fast, so drafting some re-enforcements might be a good idea. Cedric Benson or Ronnie Brown seem like good picks, but there is still a chance that a more proven back like Shaun Alexander or Edgerrin James could end up in South Beach in 2005.
4. What's your take on where the Browns are and where they may go with No. 3? Is Alex Smith or any QB a possibility?
The best option for the Browns would either be CB Antrell Rolle or LB Derrick Johnson. I think they should address that need before they start talking about QBs or WRs. Alex Smith is a nice long-term option, but Savage and Crennell will be ticket takers at the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame by the time he makes an impact. Using Harris or McCown will make more sense. Going with a defensive player would make the most sense, since they lost a lot of their guys on that side in trades and free agency.
5. Does Maurice Clarett get drafted? By anyone other than Oakland? And where does he go, round-wise?
Yes he gets drafted, but he gets drafted very late on day 2. He has proven that he is a head-case, he's proven that he doesn’t have the top notch talent anymore that he once displayed at OSU, and he's proven to be more of a problem than a privledge. That being said, in a team sport, selfish individuals are not considered priorities, no matter how much talent they have. You have to think that he'll wake up at some point, therefore, someone and yes, most likely, Oakland will take him late on day 2.
6. Do you think I, the VZ, could be drafted?
Yes, the only problem is, you will test positive for the juice. While the lethal injection of VZ has proven to be a more effective masking substance than flacid oil, I still think the NFL would find a way to detect the juice while examining the urine samples which will also show the amount of venereal diseases you've obtained through sexual intercourse with hot skinnemax actresses.
Thanks Andy, give my best to West Virginia