FRO HEAVEN’S SAKE!!
Ruthless Agression: Column 3
By Andy Barch
This first story is one that is close to home for me. Maybe I’m alone here, but I am ecstatic that Mr. Mel Kiper Jr., his amazing draft analysis and his very large afro will remain with ESPN.
There were some setbacks during contract negotiations (my guess would be that ESPN didn’t want to pay for Kiper’s personal hair stylist, God knows that has to be a chore with that ridiculous hairdo of his) but in the end the two sides finally reached an agreement, and I think we’re all better off.
Nobody spends more time or exerts more effort on the NFL draft than Mel Kiper Jr. Those that know me well, understand just how much time I spend studying the NFL draft every year, this is why I appreciate Kiper’s work so much.

Jumping from one man I appreciate, to another, which I don’t. I’ve written several articles, and made several statements about Maurice Clarett on radio shows and other websites. None of these articles or statements have been positive, but then again, has this guy done anything positive lately?

All allegations aside, whether he received benefits from boosters or not, whether they gave him jobs or not is not the issue. I think we’re all blind to the world of college athletics if we do not see that this goes on at basically EVERY institution.

What bothers me most about this situation is the fact that he does not realize what he has done. By going to the press with a story like this, even if these allegations are true, he has essentially screwed over all of those boosters who helped him out in a desperate time of need. I’m not saying what they did was right, but when someone helps you out, you don’t thank them by smacking them in the face.

In my eyes this tells me that Maurice Clarett is a guy that NOBODY can trust. It sure appears as though he’s as loyal as a politician who promises the world to his constituents and then forgets about them the second he’s elected. Anybody who thinks he is going to get drafted on Day 1 is sadly mistaken. This guy’s list of enemies is beginning to draw comparisons to Osama Bin Laden’s.

This guy is a ticking time bomb, and he has already lost TONS of credibility. Lets not forget that this guy will never be mistaken for Jim Brown, Barry Sanders or Walter Payton. He’s a one dimensional back who can pound between the tackles. He’s got no significant lateral movement, no speed off the edge, has yet to prove that he can catch passes out of the backfield or block, and he’s run a tab at every level he’s played on the injured list that has begun to rival that of Brett Saberhagen, Grant Hill and Ken Griffey Jr.

Before we begin to criticize the institution, we must first consider the source. While Clarett wasn’t the only one to come forward, the others who have, haven’t exactly been standup citizens either. This could get interesting.

Finally, perhaps the most controversial debate at every level of football right now seems to be the ethical standard of a cut/chop block. This move is about as cheap as George Costanza before he landed the Yankee’s job.

The fact that this does not constitute a penalty is about as sickening as Delta Burke on the Cover of Playboy. At every level, it is assumed that every pre-caution is taken toward maintaining the safety of every player on the field. I believe that like I believe Ron Artest’s alleged rap album will go triple platinum.

These days, I think the rules are modified to protect the pretty boy quarterbacks. This is a rule that puts defensive linemen in great danger. Try this on for size. If defensive backs are flagged and fined for hitting wide receivers when they are in defenseless positions, then why aren’t offensive linemen flagged or fined for throwing ridiculous blindside blocks like this that end season’s and threaten careers?

The instances involving Erasmus James and George Foster are the ones that stand out the most. There really isn’t much a defensive lineman can do to prevent this from happening. The only way to eliminate it is to outlaw it. The powers that be at every level have to stop acting as if offensive players deserve Air Force One protection. In order for this game to work, you’ve got to regulate both sides of the spectrum, and right now they’re making a Manny Ramirez-esque effort toward trying to fix it. Make the game safe and fair for everyone? (raise middle finger) BRILLIANT!!!

Enjoy Guiness responsibly, see you next week.